The Blessed Virgin as the Ideal Christian Woman
The Blessed Virgin as the Ideal Christian Woman
Fr. Gunnar G. Campbell
Christ is the paragon of masculinity. He is the example which all people are to follow, to be sure. But our Lord took on the flesh of a male, and so he remains for us men the perfect example of true masculine virtue and behavior. St. Paul, in his famous writing to husbands and wives in Ephesians 5, parallels the role and function of husbands towards their wives to Christ’s function towards the church, when he says, “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” Especially in our day, when even the most basic roles and men and women are muddled and confused by the world, it is necessary for us to continue to display Christ as the epitome of manhood.
But where does this leave our beloved women? Where are they to turn to see displayed truly feminine qualities? One might think of Sarah, the faithful wife of Abraham. St. Peter certainly does, especially when it comes to the subject of submission. But I think we can do one better: The Mother of God, the Virgin Mary herself. Last year, I did a study for our women’s group on this very subject. We examined most if not all of the passages that pertained to the Virgin, and saw through these verses that Mary is the example of the ideal Christian woman, both in the home and in the church. What follows is a more substantial version of that study.
The Virgin Mary as Submissive
“24 When Joseph woke from sleep, he did as the angel of the Lord commanded him: he took his wife, 25 but knew her not until she had given birth to a son. And he called his name Jesus.” – Matthew 1:24-25
“13 Now when they had departed, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream and said, “Rise, take the child and his mother, and flee to Egypt, and remain there until I tell you, for Herod is about to search for the child, to destroy him.” 14 And he rose and took the child and his mother by night and departed to Egypt.” – Matthew 2:13-14“38 And Mary said, “Behold, I am the servant of the Lord; let it be to me according to your word.” And the angel departed from her.” – Luke 1:38
Although Matthew's birth narrative focuses mostly on Joseph, Mary is by no means excluded, and through Matthew’s account, we can begin to develop a picture of Mary in which she displays godly submission to Joseph. We see Mary’s submission in two ways in these early chapters. One, she allows herself to be taken as a wife to Joseph, and thereby submits not only to the message from the angel, but also to Joseph as well. In the second place, the Blessed Virgin also, with great submission, allows herself to be taken into Egypt and eventually back to Galilee at the direction of the angel and her husband.
Do you see how little the Virgin insists on? In fact, she insists upon nothing but submitting to her husband. The idea of a prenuptial agreement probably would have nauseated the Blessed Virgin. She doesn’t insist on setting boundaries or protecting her own interests. She takes none of the advice that many modern day feminists would give to a woman entering into marriage. When Joseph tells her that they must flee to Egypt, does Mary protest that such a journey would be hard and arduous, especially with a young child? Do we hear even the slightest hint of grumbling and complaining, of wanting to check her husband’s will at the door and do what she thinks is best? None of this. Rather, with complete faith in God, she submits to Joseph, and allows herself to be taken according to the direction of the angel
Or we may look at her demeanor in St. Luke’s account of the annunciation. Her beautiful fiat, “let it be,” is perhaps one of the most beautiful utterances in the Scriptures. She no doubt had fears and trepidations. There was the great burden of the unknown that lay ahead of her. But these she all laid aside in faith and holy submission. Never does the Virgin view submission as something repugnant or oppressive, but rather as a beautiful expression of her godly and true femininity.
The Virgin Mary as Quiet
Another remarkable quality of the Virgin Mary is her quietness, which both Sts. Peter and Paul extol as a virtue of a god-fearing woman (1 Tim. 2:11-12, 1 Peter 3:4). Aside from one instance, Mary’s comments are reserved, and she is depicted with a sort of godly quietness. For such a significant figure in the Scriptures, the Mother of God has relatively few words in the Scriptures. I would argue that this is a revelation of her pious quietness. Take for example the two following verses:
34 And Mary said to the angel, “How will this be, since I am a virgin?” – Luke 1:34
3 When the wine ran out, the mother of Jesus said to him, “They have no wine.” – John 2:3
Her faithful question to the angel is short and sweet. Her appeal to her beloved Son is even more so. Could she have rattled off a litany of questions for the angel? I suppose she could have. When the wedding feast was threatened with disaster, could she have made a large scene to her Son? I think many others would have. But she is relatively quiet, or we might even say reserved, with her words.
Why? Some modern feminists may grumble at the fact that many women in the Scriptures are given no voice, and the most significant woman of them all, the Virgin Mary, is often only given a small voice. Well, this is not because the words of the Virgin, or of any Christian woman for that matter, are inferior or useless to those of men. It is not a chauvinistic attitude on the part of God. Rather, the rarity of Mary’s words demonstrate their immense value. That is, Mary understands that words are powerful, and that an unbridled tongue is full of poison. She seeks to cultivate a careful use of her words precisely because she understands the value of words that edify and give glory to God. She has a deep grasp of the faithful and good use of the tongue, which means that she refrains from idle words, from gossip, and from talkativeness. As we will see, when Mary does open her mouth to speak, her words are like gold, and her lips are in service to her confession of faith and her glorifying of God.
Mary as a Meditator of the Word and a Glorifier of God
Let us look at a few examples of Mary employing both her quietness and her words.
19 But Mary treasured up all these things, pondering them in her heart. – Luke 2:19
51 And he went down with them and came to Nazareth and was submissive to them. And his mother treasured up all these things in her heart. – Luke 2:51
Mary utilizes her quietness to meditate and ponder upon the things of God. In Luke’s gospel, we have two instances of the Virgin making the Word of God the treasure of her heart. It is interesting to note that, in both of these instances, the Virgin is presented with a Word that confuses her, that she does not fully understand or grasp. Because she has cultivated the practice of godly quietness, her heart and mind become a resting place for the Word that she receives, rather than her heart and mind being filled with things of no consequence. She, like all believers, is a true temple of God, not only because she carried in her womb the Son of God, but also because she is filled with the Holy Spirit and the life-giving Word of God.
And the result of this is remarkable. Because she stores up the Word of God in her heart, when she does speak, she speaks from the abundance of her heart. That is, when she opens her mouth, out flows true, godly words which bring glory to God. The greatest example of this is, of course, the Magnificat, which stands on its own without any further commentary needed:
“My soul magnifies the Lord,
47 and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior,
48 for he has looked on the humble estate of his servant.
For behold, from now on all generations will call me blessed;
49 for he who is mighty has done great things for me,
and holy is his name.
50 And his mercy is for those who fear him
from generation to generation.
51 He has shown strength with his arm;
he has scattered the proud in the thoughts of their hearts;
52 he has brought down the mighty from their thrones
and exalted those of humble estate;
53 he has filled the hungry with good things,
and the rich he has sent away empty.
54 He has helped his servant Israel,
in remembrance of his mercy,
55 as he spoke to our fathers,
to Abraham and to his offspring forever.” – Luke 1:46-55
The Virgin Mary as a Teacher of the Faith and a Carer of Children
The final aspect of the Blessed Virgin’s true, feminine, Christian life is that she is a carer of children and a teacher of the faith.
27 And he came in the Spirit into the temple, and when the parents brought in the child Jesus, to do for him according to the custom of the Law. – Luke 2:27
25 But standing by the cross of Jesus were his mother and his mother's sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary Magdalene. – John 19:25
From the example in Luke 2, we see that Mary, along with Joseph, was diligent to do for the Christ child according to the Law. That is, she was diligent to raise her child, the Son of God, according to the command of the Lord. To this we might also add as well her delightful confession to the servants at the wedding feast, where she says to them concerning her Son, “Do whatever he tells you.” Both in her home and in her private life, she directed others towards God and handed down the faith.
Why? Because Mary demonstrates a uniqueness among godly women, and that is to display a fierce capacity for caring for children. Perhaps the hardest verse for me to read in the Passion narrative without becoming choked up is the moment where we hear that, even in gruesome death and unjust torture, Mary is found at the foot of the cross, never averting her eyes, but ever caring for her child.. Her godly love for her child is on full display, the profoundness of her compassion and care is moving.
These, then, are the true hallmarks of a Christian woman, fully displayed for us in the most blessed Virgin Mary. Thanks be to God for her example of faith, and may He grant our women such a faith!