Beloved Gottesdienst Readers,
The Holy Season of Lent is upon us and in accord with canon law, the editors of Gottesdienst hereby proclaim an Indulgence and Dispensation for those who are abstaining from rich foods, fats, luxuries, delicacies, treats, yummies, bon-bons, etc., etc., so that they may fittingly Celebrate Creation and the First Article Gift of the ratio of a circle's circumference to its diameter. To wit: a plenary indulgence and full dispensation is hereby given for all to feast on pies of any composition whatever on Saturday, March 14, A+D 2015 at 9:26 am (and 53 seconds) local time. The appropriate treasuries of the merits of the saints will be deducted in full, etc., etc., world without end.
Issued from the Kewanee Vatican on the Feast of St. Eusebius of Cremona.