Yeah, I believed that for about 30 seconds. In their usual graceless and unmanly passive-aggressive way, they blew an opportunity to be churchly, and reverted back to their old tried and true Mean Girls modus.

Whining about the size of President Harrison’s margin of victory (sounding very much like their counterparts in secular politics, the sour-grapers who now want to abolish the Electoral College), they are not too keen to tell you that President Harrison defeated their two golden boys, who only received 39.89% and 8.35% respectively - even after a non-stop smear campaign, glossy postcards, and the hard work of the Naples, Florida Pak-n-Ship.

So it turns out that it was too much to expect even a sliver of class and dignity from our suited-hippies. Harrison Derangement Syndrome is alive and well, even if most of those who suffer with HDS are, shall we say, not too many rodeos removed from the glue factory.

Unless you’re concerned that reading this drivel might reduce your testosterone level, feel free to read it yourself. It’s especially timely considering MAD Magazine’s impending demise. Congregations Madder is rocket fuel for satire.

And I can’t help but feel bad for Christian News, the once conservative publication, which was hoist on the petard of “strange bedfellows.” CN might want to see a doctor. Those diseases are unfortunately making a comeback.

Now that the election is over, it looks like the CM groundhog has seen his shadow, and there will be three more years of dirty politics.

At any rate, I fixed CM’s graphic just in case they ever do want to grow out of their Mean Girls phase and join us at the men’s table. Here, girls, I fixed it for you.